Background
I studied computer science at Shanghai Jiao Tong University and UC San Diego, then worked in data infrastructure and now ML systems. A lot of my day-to-day thinking is about distributed systems, scheduling, reliability, and incentives.
That probably carries over into how I see life in general: I care about what is true, what is stable, and what can actually work over time.
What I am like
I am not loud, highly social, or especially casual. I connect better through sustained conversation than through fast banter.
People usually notice that I am analytical, calm, and fairly independent. I value emotional depth, but I prefer it with honesty and structure rather than vague signaling.
I enjoy thinking in depth and following an argument to its actual structure. At the same time, I am usually gentle with people and tend to have strong empathy.
Outside work, I care a lot about music and reading. I am currently taking vocal lessons, and my reading ranges from light novels to mathematics, engineering, sociopolitics, economics, and political economy.
What matters to me
- Clarity over games.
- High standards without unnecessary drama.
- Mutual respect, competence, and reliability.
- Aesthetic taste and real interior life.
- A relationship that can hold up outside the honeymoon phase.
Who I likely fit with
Probably someone empathetic, emotionally steady, and able to engage in real conversation. You do not need to share my exact background or interests, but I think it helps if reasoning comes naturally to you and if you enjoy building understanding together.
For me, the important thing is not having the same knowledge base in every area. It is being able to think clearly, exchange views honestly, and arrive at some basic shared understanding about the world.
I am writing this part less to filter people than to save both sides time. If two people have strong disagreements on how to live or what future they want, that is usually better understood earlier rather than later.
A good first date
Something low-noise and easy to talk in: coffee, dinner, or a long walk. The point is not novelty. It is whether the conversation has substance and whether being around each other feels natural.
Current life
I value career and take personal growth seriously, but I am not interested in turning my life into a pure work project. I care about doing serious work well, continuing to grow, and maintaining a life that still has room for thought, taste, and other parts of being human.
In the longer run, I currently think Asia is a better fit for the kind of life I want than the U.S., though I do not treat that as an irreversible conclusion. It is less a fixed requirement than a direction that makes sense to me for now, and something I think is worth being able to discuss openly. One point I do know more clearly is that I would not want to live in mainland China, though visiting is completely fine.